Me.me.me. I like myself a lot.

My children, who are the most wonderful in the whole world. (Grammatically speaking, there is no such thing as “the most wonderful”,but to me,they really are.)

My husband and my mum. The 2 strongest persons in my life.

My father, who is in Heaven.

Above all, Our Father in Heaven .

The sun.The rain.The flowers in my garden.A good book. Snowing when it’s dark outside. A cup of tea.My favourite T-shirt. And jeans. The trees blossoming in pink. Giggling with my children. Eating ice cream. Painting like I’m Picasso :))))My husband’s hugs when I’m crying.Old photos. My mum dancing with my kids.

Blessed to be alive.

mi-am luat medicamentul.de fapt medicamentele,ca sunt doua.una pentru frica,cealalta pt frica.toate sunt pentru frica.sau mai bine zis impotriva fricii.respira.respira cum te-au invatat.urmareste aerul cum intra in plamani,cum isi continua drumulcum….stai….mi se pare ca nu imi bate inima.nu hiperventila,ca altfel faci atac de panica.nu stiu ce e mai rau,sa-l faci sau sa-l astepti,ca stii ca vine. dar intre timp respira,nu uita sa respiri.ma doare si stomacul,nu stiu daca de la medicamentesau de la faptul ca nu pot manca mai nimic.o fii si asta pe baza nervoasa?anorexie,bulimie ,vin toate in cap.te strange de gat si nu mai stii daca ai numarat destul,nu-i nimic,ia-o de la inceput,ai timp destul,doar daca nu mori acum sau in urmatoarea secunda.dar nu mori,ca vine urmatoarea respiratie,dar tie tot ti-e frica ca mori si ti se pare ca lesini sau parca nu ,apoi iti plezneste capul si-ti vine sa vomiti,mai bine ai vomita sau mai bine n-ai vomita,ca si asa nu mananci destul,hai sa incercam cu yoga,hai sa meditam,tu si cu mine,adica eu si capul meu,apoi ma rog Doamne,ajuta-ma sa trec si peste asta si maine din nou

If someone fights anxiety,the whole family fights it too. It can be very frustrating sometimes,because they all want to help,but they don´t know how. Sometimes it escalates and that leads to more stress and more anxiety.

It can be about the last slice of cake on the plate or the last piece of salami in the fridge.Well,it`s not about that at all. It´s about desperately wanted to know that everything is fine or at least that everything is going to be fine.There´s no balance anymore and we all need balance.

I have thought a lot about coping strategies,but the truth is,it is hard. I don´t like to see my children acting like everything is normal,when it`s not. Or maybe that´s just their silent way of supporting me.

I know we all have our personal way of dealing with stress. But it breaks my heart to see them like that.

running after perfection my whole life has made me anxious and sad.It was always about better and more.I was feeling guilty all the time,that I didn´t do enough,that I was not enough. And it was getting worse. Always.

But then I came to realize that noone´s perfect. We all have our struggles.Mine has just begun (for a couple of years) and it can be a neverending story. But it´s getting better as time passes and I discover myself every single day.I have bad days,but then there´s a good day and this is all I need to move forward.